I am on a massive air force helicopter just above the city of Colombo, Sri Lanka. I'm traveling with my photographer Sanjiv in a convoy with the U.N. Secretary General to the war devastated north.

The chopper is filled with journalists from around the world. There are more people than seat belts and I am sitting in front of a door that is wide open looking down at the tops of trees. But in this job where you take what you can get.

This trip is important to us because for so long we have been kept away from the story we wanted to tell the most - the story of more than 250,000-plus people who survived horrific conditions as fierce battles raged in and around their villages.

The government of Sri Lanka has put heavy restrictions on journalist's access to the north in the final months of the war. We’ve only had government statements and government video and periodical news from pro-rebel forces.

Getting to the truth about what is really happening to innocent civilians on the ground has been nearly impossible.

The stories from the two sides as well as aid groups working in the war zone have varied widely. Getting perspective is important but it just hasn't happened.

As a journalist it is the most frustrating experience because you can't get independent confirmation. Every time we report something, one side or the other disputes it, and the truth remains a mystery. Some of it always will, but at least we have the chance of talking to the very people who lived it.